Are you feeling excited and elated about retirement or are you in fear and dread of it? This is the most significant transition in your life. Out ahead of you is the potential to life 30+ years more. So, it is worth pausing for refection before passing this threshold to retirement.
We now have arrived at this threshold finding out how we got to this point in the preceding phases would be useful. A timeline is a fantastic way to represent this with the highs and challenges. This can be an excellent reference point from here.
From this review of our life there will be items which we will wish to carry forward to our next phase. We may well find that there are things we may have left aside, things that we were passionate about, things that gave us joy, but we had higher priorities competing for our time. Now we have an opportunity to take these up again. There may be strengths which we held dear which we now wish to further develop in the years to come. Also, where there were challenges highlighted some of these may still need attention, unfinished business to fix and or bring closure to.
In my book and seminar REIGNITE Rewire not Retire: 7 steps to living with passion, power, and purpose in retirement I term the first step “RE”. This is a wonderful way to conduct a review and reflection.
The “RE”s may be divided into those considered positive and negative. It is worth reminding ourselves that these are only labels that we use. They are our judgments of our life circumstances and the world around us. They represent our particular take, our lens of perception, attitudes, and beliefs. So, rather than view these as polar opposites we could adopt the attitude in this review as one of opportunity to make the necessary changes, move forward filling our life from heron with what we want rather than live an imprison life of stagnation and paralysis believing life will be nothing more than what has gone before. We create our lives through the choices we make through our thoughts, emotions, and behaviours.
So, lets unpack a sample of what we need to consider in this first step RE.
Reconnect There may be people with whom we have lost contact with and perhaps now we have the opportunity to link in with them.
Reassess There may be activities and responsibilities which you have been carrying up to now it may be opportune to consider whether you wish to continue with these or let them go. Perhaps these could be more of a burden than anything else. It may well be time to gently let them fall away. It may well be time for others to step up to the plate and carry them instead. This reassess could relate to people as well as activities.
Redefine This may very well be an opportunity for us to define ourselves for our life from hereon. We no longer have the title or role that was associated with our working life – that part of us we have no left behind.
Note – this topic is just briefly referenced here. However, as it is of major importance there is a specific section devoted to it both my book and seminar, “I” Identity.
Reclaim Perhaps you had a passion and talent which had to be left aside because of competing higher priorities at the time. You may have been involved in creative expression such as art, writing, pottery, music, singing, dance, or a host of other activities in years passed. These may have been left aside because of a hectic career, raising a family, or caring for an elderly person to mention a few. Now with your newfound freedom it may well be time to explore these talents, reclaiming them and connecting with this expression of you.
Rejoice This is something that can escape us. Maybe we have been too busy with live in a fast and doing mode. It might have been moving from one completed project to initiating the next one without a pause to breath and rejoice in what we have accomplished before engaging in the next.
We may have spent little or no time rejoicing in the gift of life taking it for granted. How many people have not been presented with the gift of reaching retirement. We could also use this reflection to consider all that we have in your life.
Now turning to the second category let us review the following:
Reject Many items could fall into this subcategory. Perhaps the most important of these is what are the aspects of us which may have been rejected. What are the parts of self that were forced down and hidden from us ever looking at. These are all aspects of us. Shutting them out is not the answer.
Who is the real you . Not the projected image that is presented to the world.
Regret This could relate to something that you regret doing or not doing. This maybe something way in the past but occasionally it pops into your thoughts. Now may be a suitable time to decide on what you wish to do about this and take some action to address the situation or at least get some closure on it.
Remorse This could be related to side stepping opportunities to better ourselves when they were presented and available to us. Deciding to opt for short cuts may have been more appealing and better at the time to keep up with the pace of living in the fast lane. These opportunities which were passed by would certainly have involved effort and commitment. The result however would have produced and provided a richer life.
There may very well be a lot of more “RE”s as you start your review and reflection. Add more as necessary.
Having completed this review and reflection we may be prompted to take action. This could take on a myriad of forms. We need to remember with any action which might be an interaction with another, that we can only be responsible for our part and what is within our control. We do not have control over the outcome, and we do not have control over anyone else.
Other actions may prompt us to set goals. This phase of life is no less important that the other phases of our life to date. Goals setting can use SMART technique as follows:
“S” – specific, “M” – measurable, “A” – achievable and it also needs to be followed up with actions, “R” – relevant and realistic and “T” – time bound.
The rewards from engaging in the review and the reflective practices are many not least those of emotional intelligence and integrity. Self-awareness one of the four dimensions to emotional intelligence can be increased through reflective practices.
If you found this blog interesting, I would love to receive your comments in my Facebook Page “Thrive in Your Third Act.” https://www.facebook.com/p/Thrive-in-Your-Third-Act-100067073644642/ .
Wishing you an amazing Third Act, Ann
